I Want to Eat Your Pancreas (Japanese: 君の膵臓をたべたい, Hepburn: Kimi no Suizō o Tabetai, lit. "I Want to Eat Your Pancreas"), also known in the English-language edition as I Want to Eat Your Pancreas or Let Me Eat Your Pancreas, is a novel by Japanese author Yoru Sumino. The work was first published as a web novel on the site Shōsetsuka ni Narō in 2014, before being published in print by Futabasha in 2015 with cover illustrations by loundraw. This novel became Sumino's debut work that launched his name in the Japanese literary industry.
The story centers on the unusual relationship between a quiet, unnamed male student and his popular classmate, Sakura Yamauchi, who secretly suffers from a fatal pancreatic disease. This provocative title comes from an ancient belief that eating the organ of a sick animal can cure a similar disease, a metaphor used to describe the desire to truly accept and become part of another person's life, even with their suffering.
Synopsis
The story begins when the male protagonist, who prefers to be alone and read books, accidentally finds a diary in a hospital waiting room. The diary, titled "Living with Dying", turns out to belong to Sakura Yamauchi, the popular and cheerful girl in his class. From the diary, he learns that Sakura suffers from a pancreatic disease and has only a little time left to live.
Instead of feeling shocked or pitying, the protagonist acts as usual, a reaction that instead makes Sakura interested. Because no one else knows her secret, she begins to approach the protagonist and invite him to spend time together. They then begin a series of adventures, including a trip to Fukuoka to enjoy local cuisine and stay at a hotel. Sakura pushes the reserved protagonist to open up, while she herself tries to live the rest of her life with full spirit, making a list of wishes (a bucket list) that she wants to fulfill.
In their journey, a deep emotional bond is formed. Sakura reveals that in ancient culture, there is a belief that eating the diseased organ of a loved one can cure the disease and make their spirit live forever inside that person—an explanation behind the story's strange title. However, their story ends tragically. When they promise to meet after Sakura is discharged from the hospital, Sakura never comes. The protagonist later learns from the news that Sakura was stabbed to death by a serial killer on the street.
Characters
"Boku" / Haruki Shiga
The main male character, who is unnamed throughout most of the story and is more often referred to as "Boku" (meaning "I" in Japanese). His real name, Haruki Shiga, is only revealed at the end of the story. He is depicted as a high school student who is quiet, a loner, has no friends, and whose emotions tend to be flat. This very nature is what instead makes Sakura interested, because he does not treat her differently after learning of her illness. His character development becomes the core of the story, in which he slowly learns to connect with others through Sakura's influence.
Sakura Yamauchi
A cheerful, popular, and spirited high school girl. Behind her bright nature, she keeps a great secret: she suffers from a fatal pancreatic disease and has only a little time left to live. Sakura is the catalyst who pushes the protagonist out of his comfort zone. She wants to live without regrets and often makes jokes about her coming death, a way for her to face a bitter reality. Her relationship with the protagonist gives her space to be herself without needing to pretend.
Kyoko
Sakura's best friend. Kyoko is one of the people who cares deeply about Sakura and feels betrayed when she learns that her friend kept a great secret about her illness from her. Her role becomes important at the end of the story, when the protagonist meets her to share the contents of Sakura's diary as a final message from that friend.
Media
Novel
The original novel was written by Yoru Sumino and first published as a web novel on the site Shōsetsuka ni Narō in 2014. Its success on that platform led to print publication by Futabasha on June 19, 2015. The novel was illustrated by loundraw for its print edition cover. In Indonesia, the novel is published by Penerbit Haru. The novel has sold more than 2 million copies and received a wide reception for its exploration of themes of life, death, and human connection.
Manga
A manga adaptation illustrated by Izumi Kirihara was serialized in Futabasha's Monthly Action magazine from August 25, 2016 to May 25, 2017. Its chapters were later compiled into two tankōbon volumes. The manga was also released in English by Seven Seas Entertainment and in Indonesia by M&C!.
Animated Film
The anime film adaptation of the novel was produced by Studio VOLN and distributed by Aniplex. The film was directed and written by Shin'ichirō Ushijima, with music composed by Hiroko Sebu. The film premiered in Tokyo on July 24, 2018 and was released widely in Japan on September 1, 2018. The main voice cast includes Mahiro Takasugi as the protagonist and Lynn as Sakura Yamauchi. The animated film received positive reviews for its animation, emotional storytelling, and the message it conveys.
Live-Action Film
Before the animated film, a live-action film titled Let Me Eat Your Pancreas was released first on July 28, 2017. The film was directed by Sho Tsukikawa and starred Takumi Kitamura as Haruki Shiga and Minami Hamabe as Sakura Yamauchi. The film was a commercial success, grossing more than ¥3.52 billion in Japan and becoming one of the highest-grossing films of that year.
Themes and Reception
Kimi no Suizō o Tabetai is widely categorized as a coming-of-age story and a drama. Its main themes revolve around acceptance of death, the importance of human relationships, and how to live life fully amid uncertainty. Its unique title often becomes a starting point for discussion, in which its metaphorical meaning is revealed throughout the story: the desire to absorb another person's existence and suffering as a form of love and total acceptance.
Many critics praise its emotional depth and character development, especially the protagonist's transformation from a loner into someone able to feel loss and love. However, there are also those who criticize the plot twist at the end of the story in which Sakura dies not from her illness, but from murder. Some parties consider this to reduce the thematic impact of the story about struggling against disease and to rely too much on dramatic surprise. Even so, the story is generally regarded as one of the saddest and most moving stories of the decade.
References
Wikipedia, "I Want to Eat Your Pancreas"
Wikipedia Bahasa Melayu, "Izinkan Kumakan Pankreasmu"
Wikipedia bahasa Indonesia, "Kimi no Suizou wo Tabetai"
SuperSummary, "I Want to Eat Your Pancreas Book Brief"
MyAnimeList, "Novel 'Kimi no Suizou wo Tabetai' Receives Anime Film Adaptation"
The StoryGraph, "Reviews with content warning for Violence - I Want to Eat Your Pancreas"
CBR, "How I Want to Eat Your Pancreas Ruined Its Potential"
FandomWire, "I Want to Eat Your Pancreas Fans Forget Too Easily How Problematic of a Character Haruki Shiga Was"
Japanese Station, "Novel Terkenal Kimi no Suizo wo Tabetai Merilis Visual Image Animenya"
Douban, "我想吃掉你的胰脏：听起来像恐怖片，知道真相后哭出来"
TEGASIAN, "Let Me Eat Your Pancreas: Kisah Cinta yang Menghancurkan dan Membangun"